Today, I write because I owe myself a few, last words that I shall dedicate to the past few months of my life, the person I had become, the person that I am now, the person I will always be, and the person I will sought to be.
I've changed. For the better I'd like to believe. Things that didn't matter before, have now found their place in my life.. a place I now respect. Emotions that didn't make sense a little less than a year back, are the very same ones that I now accept as a part of the many things I had to learn.
I've grown as a person. Or so I tell myself. I've learned to forgive if not forget.
Conscience always comes in way of things you want to go ahead with. I have learnt to deal with my conscience, to fight it off and switch it off ! Ultimately, what we do today is what we most want today, and thus it becomes most desirable for one. It is indeed a very small life and you never get a second chance to fulfill your desires. I have learnt to stand against people and their opinions... I have learnt how to remain silent and let things take their natural course.... I have learnt how to take every day as it comes.....
I've learnt how to make sorrows worthy of that pain that they bring along with themselves. I've learnt that there's no turning back.. even if you're not too far ahead. I've learned how to stand by the decisions I've made... even if they hurt too much. I've learnt how to never stop myself from taking the risk.
I've learnt how to give myself a chance. I've learnt how to give myself reasons that make sense and hear others out even when it's the last thing I want to do.
A part of me will never change. I won't let it. Because that part of me will always define the essence of the person I will always be. I know what it feels like to lose the upper hand over people. I know what it feels like to be overwhelmed.
I know how it feels to finally be able to breathe again. I know how it feels to never regret decisions you've made... and to stick by that even when everything turns against you.
As I try to fight the exhaustion which is persuading my mind to fall asleep whilst it is trying to finish what it wants me to pen down, I realize that at the end of the day, we all make the same mistakes, we all learn the same lessons in different ways...And life goes on..... Teaching us, tempting us, making us grow, taking us higher, going on and on.......
I've changed. For the better I'd like to believe. Things that didn't matter before, have now found their place in my life.. a place I now respect. Emotions that didn't make sense a little less than a year back, are the very same ones that I now accept as a part of the many things I had to learn.
I've grown as a person. Or so I tell myself. I've learned to forgive if not forget.
Conscience always comes in way of things you want to go ahead with. I have learnt to deal with my conscience, to fight it off and switch it off ! Ultimately, what we do today is what we most want today, and thus it becomes most desirable for one. It is indeed a very small life and you never get a second chance to fulfill your desires. I have learnt to stand against people and their opinions... I have learnt how to remain silent and let things take their natural course.... I have learnt how to take every day as it comes.....
I've learnt how to make sorrows worthy of that pain that they bring along with themselves. I've learnt that there's no turning back.. even if you're not too far ahead. I've learned how to stand by the decisions I've made... even if they hurt too much. I've learnt how to never stop myself from taking the risk.
I've learnt how to give myself a chance. I've learnt how to give myself reasons that make sense and hear others out even when it's the last thing I want to do.
A part of me will never change. I won't let it. Because that part of me will always define the essence of the person I will always be. I know what it feels like to lose the upper hand over people. I know what it feels like to be overwhelmed.
I know how it feels to finally be able to breathe again. I know how it feels to never regret decisions you've made... and to stick by that even when everything turns against you.
As I try to fight the exhaustion which is persuading my mind to fall asleep whilst it is trying to finish what it wants me to pen down, I realize that at the end of the day, we all make the same mistakes, we all learn the same lessons in different ways...And life goes on..... Teaching us, tempting us, making us grow, taking us higher, going on and on.......
2 comments:
"The person I will sought to be" ?
"Life is too small" ?
Firs time on this blog ..and already started feeling like I missed a lot :))
Yeah..life goes on..so, if we really desire to achieve something, we better start early without waiting for "right" opportunity..
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